For a long time, I was silent about what he did to me, and others, that caused the abrupt and some what public end to our friendship. I was a ref, trying to get in good and seem professional with any league I could, most importantly Ref Cert and Rat City. I felt for a long time that it would be better for me to not “bad mouth” this person because he had power in the community. I protected him. Since leaving roller derby and ceasing to give a fuck what people in the sport think of me I’ve been willing to tell anyone who will listen what happened.
Jason Megatron Burrows raped me.
It happened while we were still friends, and it wasn’t the cause of the end of our friendship. We were driving in my car (something that happened often, as he seemed to depend on me for that) after leaving his office. We has a “friends with benefits” relationship at the time. He thought it would be funny to put his hand down my pants and touch my pussy in an attempt to pleasure me while I was driving. I SCREAMED at him to stop, slamming on the breaks repeatedly to try and scare him into stopping. The closer we got to the on ramp of I5, the more scared I got. It was unsafe and 100% non consensual. It took me actually pulling over and getting out of the car for him to see that this wasn’t a game to me. I wan’t playing nor was I arroused. Once he realized I didn’t think it was funny he acted like all I needed to do to get him to stop was to say so.
This happened months before I ended our friendship. I didn’t even see this as rape at the time. He was my best friend and someone I had a sexual relationship with at the time, how could it be rape?
Months later, he had a sexual relationship with another person in the sport that I was friends with. He had told be about their encounter. She had also confided in me. I put two and two together and realized that he had told her that it was okay to have unprotected sex because A) he had had a vasectomy and B) he hadn’t been sexually active for quite some time. I knew the latter was untrue because not only was he having unprotected sex with me, he had had unprotected sex with at least 2 other skaters in the past few weeks.
Once I learned this I was livid. I suddenly saw how he used his status in the derby community to manipulate and deceive women in order to have sex with them. I told him he had 24 hours to come clean with this woman or I would. They had a conversation, where he fessed up to some things, but not the fact that he had been sexually active with many women, unprotected, and that she should get tested. Ultimately I had to be the one to tell her.
Years later, at nationals, years after I had left derby I was volunteering doing badge check in. He was media. Badge check in was held in a small room at the hotel. He was hanging out in the room talking to skaters. I asked the local league skaters I was working with if we could ask him to leave the room. When they asked why I said “because he raped me”. The skaters literally threw their hands up and said “I don’t want to get involved”. I then found the courage to publicly say to him “Look, I have to be here, you don’t. Can you please leave”. He feigned confused and reluctantly left.
About 6 months ago I randomly received an email from him apologizing for many things but nothing specific. He mentioned taking a look at his life and seeing how he “may have hurt me” and how he wanted to “own up” to his actions. I shared this email with a friend…. she had received the identical email.